Saturday, December 5, 2009

Stages of Grief

Rudy's mom here guest writing.
This has been one whale of a ride! yesterday Rudy was going to have his teeth cleaned. 7:40 the vet called to tell me the news about his renal failure. The stages of grief started immediately.

- Shock/Disbelief and Denial; Not my beautiful red boy, not my 2 year old, he has to have bad teeth.
- Anger; why me. why have I had the fortune to have 2 red boys with renal failure; and a total break down into sobs
- Bargaining and Guilt; You knew something was wrong,, you should have been more forceful
- Depression; totally numb.

Finally my logical brain kicked in and made me realize that Rudy's health is what it is all about, his comfort, his pain level. there is nothing that can be done for him due to the unusual condition. The best is to give him one last weekend, donate his body so that they can learn more about his condition, and give Maggie and Buster all the love they need while they grieve. I have now reached:
- Acceptance and Hope


  1. I am so very, very sorry to learn of this sad tale. My own tears are flowing with yours. The story parallels that of our little Soot...who is my avatar. She was only 4-1/2 years old when she passed suddenly of a mystery illness..the vet could not find a reason, even after necropsy. That was a year ago October, and I'm still grieving.

    You can read about our crew on their blog at: Soot's story is in the archived section.

    You can be sure Soot will be at the bridge to welcome your Rudy. Words cannot express the feelings. I am so, so sorry.

  2. Our hearts go out to you with love and kindness. It is painful to think about loss, but we feel so honored that you have elected to share Rudy's story.

    Love is an amazing thing.... as much as you invest is as much as you will receive. You've clearly invested a lot of love and your loss, great. Please know that we are all here for you, holding all of you close in love to help sooth the pain, and also in joy - joy to help celebrate the life of Rudy.

    Rudy has much to teach all of us - we will continue to learn from him. We will all learn to become a little bit more quiet and listen for his gentle teachings.

    Thank you for sharing his life & love with us.


  3. I send purrs of comfort and love to you. I and my hooman are grieving with you, although we know we cannot begin to imagine how you feel. Rudy will be missed by so many xxx *MarmaladeMorrisHuggles*

  4. I am so sorry to read your news. Saylor (, my precious 8 yr old kitty, was diagnosed with heart disease in Oct. of '06. I dread the day I have to say goodbye to him but will do the best for him and his comfort. He loves life and illness would take that from him.

    You will both be in my thoughts on Monday.

  5. Rudy's Mom: Rudy was my furrend. He was such a handsome cat, as well as sweet and nice. It's so sad to hear that he's so sick. I will miss him but but don't feel guilty about ending his suffering. We anipals don't like to suffer. Only the good die young and Rudy was great.
    CathyKeisha with leaky eyes

  6. I am so very sorry to hear about Rudy, he is a lovely pal who was so kind to me when he heard about my dental op next week.
    You are a very brave lady to allow research into his condition and I admire your strength of character.
    My heartfelt sympathy is with you all - I will miss Rudy.

  7. Rudy and mom: Our thoughts are with you at this time. Mom understands and completely respects the decision to spare Rudy further suffering but there are no words to express the feeling of lose all of us who knew Rudy in some way will feel. Our hearts go out to you now and we will be here to support and grieve with you along the way.


  8. in late 2006 my beloved kitty boy -- who was also an orange cat -- died of renal failure.

    kitty boy lives on in his children and grandchildren and in our hearts.

    be well. i lit a candle for rudy and am still saying prayers for him.